How meh is The Mummy? Let me count the ways. For all the huffing and puffing and digital desperation from overworked computers, this reboot lands onscreen with a resounding thud. Tom Cruise should have played the Mummy – that way his face would be swathed in bandages and his fans wouldn't have to see him sweat so hard to get this lumbering loser off the ground.
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This article originally appeared on www.rollingstone.com: 'The Mummy' Review: First of 'Dark Universe' Reboots Is a Monster Fail
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